Children: 2 daughters

Family Building Journey: Tom and his husband built their family through two separate private, domestic, open, transracial adoptions using two different agencies. After waiting nearly two years for their second child, they nearly gave up. Then, one day, she arrived unexpectedly to everyone (yes, including her birth mother) and completely changed our lives. Our girls are five years apart.

Parenting Advice: As an adoptive parent, I often (and sometimes still do) felt increased pressure to be the perfect parent. It was and is an unrealistic expectation. You will make mistakes. Some will be small and some will be bigger. It’s ok. Be kind to yourself. Give yourself some grace. Give yourself permission to mess up. You’re learning as you go – we all are!